It may be because I’m not feeling all that well… have a cold/flu at the moment… my head is all fuzzy. It may be because it’s just too much.
I had the day off today because my shoot that was planned, got postponed cos the mom-to-be is not well.
I want my weekends back.
I want to be able to garden.
I want to be able to shop without a time limit.
I want to be able to go on a photo expedition into Braamfontein today because there’s an interesting sounding market.
I want to find a venue for the photo workshop I want to organise for next month.
I want to fix up my house.
I want to get curtain rods and new curtains
I want to look for a new door for the guest bathroom
I want to look for new lights for the house because I hate the ones we have
I want to find a builder to sort out our upstairs area and staircase and patio area (it’s a desperate issue)
I want to buy paint so Lance can start painting inside.
Except I can’t. The kids drive me INSANE if they come shopping with me for more than half an hour, and today is the first day that I’ve had off since Christmas.
I just don’t have the time.
Today, I went to the nursery really early this morning without the kids so I could get a few plants to rescue my garden. Lance then went to work. I took the kids with me to meet a bride at a venue… they went ballistic after 30 minutes and ignored all my threats 
. Then took them to lunch at a kiddy friendly place just to have some peace. Then brought them home to have a swim. I now have to coax them to get them to come grocery shopping with me (and I know I’m going be a screaming banshee through most of the trip because they’re a disaster together), and then I want to take the dogs for a walk, before starting supper because Madelein is coming over.
And I’m tired.
I should really be organising stuff for Connor’s birthday next week… but there’s no time for that either.
And tomorrow I have to meet friends for breakfast. Try fit in curtain rod buying. Organise food. Try fit in organising canvases to get printed, and follow up on the books I’m waiting for. And I really really want to go to the new market at Arts on Main!!
All with the kids.
And then I have a photoshoot.
PS. Promise my next few posts will be a bit more positive 
Comments
Janet
Oh dear Jeanette! Too much to do and too little time! Do hope you get over this ‘flu thing! Keep your chin up!
Laura Allmayer
Honestly – I think you need a time out. I get its hard but maybe a few days off in the week – kids at school, no photo shoots where you can do curtains and paint or nothing!
Before you burn out proper – make the time!
Tanya
I’m with Laura
Ness at Drovers Run
OK, you know how some moms like to talk about how “becoming a mother, I realised I can do anything!” To that I say…horse sh*t! There is only so much you can do. I also have two boys, and I just point blank refuse to take them somewhere together unless it’s all four of us as a family. When it’s just me, no amount of threats, raised voices or privilege removal works at all. I know what it feels like to try and see a client, only to feel like a totally unprofessional dweeb, because you have your kids with you. I.feel.your.pain. But at some point you have to be the one who throws your hands up and says *enough*. Don’t reach that point when it’s already too late and you feel to broken to fix it. The downside with going full time into freelancing, is that those things like curtain rails and building and what not take a back seat, because suddenly you’re counting every penny, and the cushion of that regular salary is just a distant memory. You absolutely have the talent drive and determination to make every success of it – but just beware, that there will be sacrifices too.
Melany
You are so overworked. (((hugs)))
fionads
I don’t know how you do it Jeanette. Working full day and having a family is already so tiring…yet you do so much more. It’s no wander you are feeling burnt out. You definitely need a break and if you ever need help on a Saturday with anything please just shout (even if it’s looking after the boys for a few hours)?
cat@juggling act
You know I always say that I have no idea how you do this. But maybe, you should book out a weekend a month with no shoots?
arkwife
Oh no lady! ((hugs)) This must be killing you
Have you ever thought about maybe getting an au pair? That way you can balance seeing and spending time with your kids and doing all the other things that you want to do? I even know a couple of au pairs who could help you?
Marcia (123 blog)
First, I think you should take up Fiona on babysitting for a few hours
And second, do something for yourself before you burn out. Your body is telling you to slow down and take time out… listen…
Hannalee
Jenty, I want to commend you for your brave post. Not every photographer has the guts to admit that taking photos is not always glamorous and that being a mom and working weekends really sucks! Hats off to you my friend. Here’s to us reminding each other we are not alone!
Corey~ living and loving
Thinking of you, Jeanette. It is totally normal to feel like you do. You have so very much going on. It really doesn’t seem like you have much time to just enjoy it all. You are running form one thing to the next. I hope you can find balance.
Angel
Thats a crappy head space to be in. Hugs.