I can’t believe the difference that only 6 years can make.

I read my mom’s blog post that she wrote yesterday about my grandmother.   I now have tears in my eyes.

It was Granny Sylvia’s birthday yesterday, and she’s living in a home in Somerset West.  When I saw her 18 months ago, she didn’t recognise me at all.  She had no idea who I was.   **I can’t actually believe it was so long ago that I went to CT, jeez! Just realised as I typed that sentence!  I have to do something about that!**

Just as my mom wrote in her blog post, I won’t remember my granny the way she is now.  To me, she’s a free spirited lady who always dressed impeccably and was always ready for action.  I remember her playing tennis and bridge and doing flower arranging and loving life.  I’ll always remember the birthday where she wanted to go white water rafting down the Zambezi, but went on a trip to London on her own instead.

And this photo that I took from my mom’s blog says it all… mucking in with playing with Bradley…

Granny and Bradley in 2004

Belated happy birthday Granny!

Oh and remember I told you about all the hair that Bradley had as a baby… check out the last photo on my mom’s blog post!

1. I confirmed that if I drink red wine in the evening, which is my favourite past time, I am guaranteed to fall asleep at my PC while editing photos. It’s a really sad state of affairs considering how much I love my wine
2. Even though he wanted the puppies so badly, Bradley was a little uneasy with them the first few days. The dogs woke Bradley up at 4:30am on Saturday, and I found him cornered next to the front door, with Kimo bouncing in front of him… trying to get at his slippers. LOL! It was quite funny.
3. Doing a family shoot with 14 people is not easy… especially when you can’t place the one person… I could not for the life of me understand where she fitted in… and she wasn’t listed in my brief.
4. Our house needs a serious revamp… that photoshoot yesterday was at my dream kind of house… and I’m now itching to change my home!

I’m not in a good space today.

Bradley’s been acting up a bit at home and school recently, he’s not concentrating and the teacher says he’s being disruptive in class.  Yes, the same child that’s normally a star and got merits etc etc.  Oh and he was bullied by a girl the other day in class, she called him names, so he hit her on the shoulder so he got into trouble for that too!

Anyhoo, Lance asked Bradley last night whether something was bothering him.  It took him a while, but eventually he spoke to Lance before he went to sleep, and said that he misses playing with us.

We don’t play with him anymore.

I suppose he’s right.  I’m forever working.  I’m either at work, or editing or at photoshoots.  Lance is always pottering around on his laptop.We’re not really spending time just playing with them.  Lance plays cricket with them in the afternoons, but that’s instructions again, and organised play, it’s not play!

It’s not fair.

Something is going to have to change.

And this blog is getting boring, and seems to me like I’m always moaning lately

As soon as I took this photo of Connor yesterday, my mom commented that she had a similar one that she had taken on my 3rd birthday.

So, she got my dad to scan the photos for me.  LOL isn’t that funny!!

And I have to show you one more of me… how short is this dress?! Sign of the times I suppose considering it was 1975

It’s been a week since my role changed and I moved to a different company within the group, and I feel like a different person.

It’s the smallest detail that’s made the most difference.   OK, I’m not that busy yet, but it’s getting there, and my intended role has already changed… but that’s ok… I’m learning new stuff and that’s never a bad thing in my books.

The biggest difference for me in the last week is time related. The fact that I don’t HAVE to stay in the office until 5pm when the market closes has made the world of difference.  The fact that, in fact, you don’t have to wait until 15 minutes AFTER the close of the market before leaving or else you get odd looks and frowns has made an enormous impact on my life.

I can actually leave earlier, and get to see my boys and play with them a bit before rushing with supper and homework and bath and bed time.

Because of this change, I’ve started going to work earlier now too.  Because I actually feel like being there earlier.

Leaving after 5pm in my old role meant that I only got home at 6:30pm if I needed to stop and get the basics at the shops on route home.  That’s very late to start supper with grumpy kids and a grumpy me.

And already, I’m less tense about life in general.

I’ve seen this Friday Fragments meme on a few blogs recently, and it’s just perfect for today… so without further adieu, here are my fragmented thoughts for this cold and rainy Friday evening.

• The party I was going to go to tomorrow has been cancelled due to the crap weather… so I have a free day that I hadn’t planned and I’m already feeling at a bit of a loss.
• Think I’ll go shopping though for a new handbag
• I’m going to finish my nieces pressies to send to New Zealand and hopefully they get them before Xmas! I’ve been very slack for the last few years so I’m DETERMINED to get them nice gifts to make up a little!
• Oh heck, I suppose I’d also get the school teachers presents too, considering the schools break up soon.
• Lance finally found a car!! Woohoo!! So we’ll be a 2 car family again from next week   Yay I have my freedom back!
• I’m eyeing out a new lens.  I really really want to get a 70-200mm f2.8 IS, but… it’s freaking expensive… but I am doing quite a few weddings next years that’ll pay for the lens and I need the lens for the weddings… and I’ve had an offer from someone in Europe to bring it back for me so I’ve worked out I can save R5000 by buying it there, rather than in SA.  But… it’s a LOT of money.
• Madi’s husband is doing some work at our house at the moment and breaking down the massive carport that we’ve never used and which is rotting.  Now I have to redo part of the garden! Fun, but again expensive!
• I got asked today whether I was OK, and almost started crying.  I can’t think about my feelings right now… I can’t handle it.  So, I walked away and didn’t say anything, it’s better that way.
• I’m so very cold… I should really go to bed and sleep but the photos… they won’t edit themselves

I’m obsessed with money at the moment, can you tell?

We went to visit Lance’s mom in Parys on Sunday, and for some reason Bradley asked me whether she worked at all. I replied no, she just stays at home.

So then he carried on talking… “so you work, and Daddy works, and Papa works, and Lainey works and granny works”
Me “No, Granny doesn’t work either”
Bradley replies “Oh yes she does, she does Pilates and Yoga!!”

So there you go Mom, all your exercise is work

* Papa = my dad
**Lainey = my sister
***Granny = my mom

I know one shouldn’t wish one’s life away… and it’s only 3 months until Christmas, but man, this month has been bad.  Next month can only be better.  @Tertia and @EveD were just saying the same thing on Twitter, and I have to moan here too!

Reasons why this month has been crap include:

1. Connor being hospitalised

2.  Lance still not finding a job

3.  Fights and more fights at work and everyone in the strangest of moods

4.  Nicole (SIL) being hospitalised for unknown causes

5.  Bradley starting to lie more and more often, and it’s a huge cause for concern

6.  Realisation that I have to redo a corporate shoot because I forgot to ask the men to wear jackets – so I know they won’t be accepted and I won’t be paid for it.

7.  I’m so very tired and I can’t snap out of this mood

8.  Pool looks like a pond, and we have to replace the pump and the filters and the pipes.

9.  Stove packed in, and still can’t find the cause for it… and we really don’t have the money to replace the whole thing

10. Garden is an absolute mess and needs time and money spent on it.

.. and the list goes on…

I did actually go to work today, and while I was there I was quite productive… but I also did the following:

1.  Delivered photos… well, not personally… Lance printed photos for me and delivered them to a client (it’s handy to have him at home at times like this)

2.  Donated blood.  I haven’t donated since the HIV incident, and now that I’ve been the clear for so long, it’s safe to donate again  The blood service actually comes to our offices every 6 weeks and sets up stations for donations.  In fact, to remind their regular donors, we also get reminder emails and phone calls from the SANBS a few days before. It’s very handy, because I used to always forget.

3.  Trekked to the other side of the world to visit Nicole (my SIL) in hospital.  The trip home took forever in peak hour traffic, but I’m very glad I saw her with my mom, and she had some company for the hour that we were there.  My mom and brother have blogged about her hospital stay.  She’s been in hospital since last Thursday.  At first they suspected swine flu, but she didn’t respond to treatment and the blood results came back negative.  Thankfully, she’s doing slightly better now, even though they have no idea what’s wrong yet.  She’s not in high care anymore, and she’s now in the cardiac unit undergoing test after test.  Even the hour we spent there today, tired her out a lot, and she needed to go back on her oxygen canula when we left.  I really hope they get to the bottom of the problem soon, so she can go home.

4.  Saw Bradley ride his bike without training wheels for the first time with help!  That’s HUGE!  I’m so glad I was home to see it.  He’s hates not being able to do something, and it was frustrating him, but today he got it right.  OK, he’s not flying around on his bike yet, but at least he can go a bit without help. I reckon he’ll have it sorted by the end of the week, and then we can take him riding on the road again.

5.  Took the boys to get pizza.  It may seem tiny to you, but I’ve been getting home so late in the last few months that I’ve just got supper on the way home.  The boys love going to get pizza, and watching the guys make it etc, and it was nice to spend some time with them too.  One day I’ll get a job where I can leave the office before 5pm again, these late evenings kill me.

So, all in all, it was a good day

Lance had supper ready by the time I got home tonight.  And he’d been to the shops!! And the homework was done! Wow!

I told him this evening, that I could get used to this house-husband thing.  If I made enough money for him to stay at home, I’d be fine with going to work and doing my photography on weekends.

He was horrified!! LOL! Which is hilarious considering that’s what he’s been joking about doing since we got married!

I think the last few weeks at home have cured him of that illusion.  He now reckons he’d sweep streets rather than stay at home all day