We went to see Hannah’s home (St Jane de Chantal Haven) again today to pick up the kids Xmas wishlist (it actually was not what we were looking for, so I’m going again tomorrow).

There were 4 of us that went today.  I took my trusty camera with me again, but I didn’t feel like photos while we were there, it was just not the right time.  In fact, we all felt so down when we left, and no-one spoke at all on the way back to the office.

We got there at nap-time, so we really disturbed the routine of the house.  Hannah wasn’t there, so the ladies showed us in (we took more clothes and toys for the kids too) and said we could see the kids.  The ladies are quite wary of us, without Hannah being around, and they’re difficult to communicate with, so we didn’t get much info from them.
The babies were all in their cots, so when we arrived the ones that could stand were all just standing in their cots and looking at us with puppy-dog eyes (they wanted to get out).  It’s strange, because all babies do that if they’re left alone in cots (Connor too), but this was just quite heart-wrenching to see.  
The boys were quite happy to play with us peering over their cots, but the girls just stood and stared.  So different from last week.

The blue room got to us all the most.  Hannah explained the last time, that the blue room is used for small babies, and when one of the children is very ill and possible dying, they move that child there to be alone so he/she gets more privacy.
Last week, that room had 2 cribs and 1 cot in it, and she told us that Jiminy Cricket stayed there, as he is only 4 months old.
It looked vastly different today though.  There’s now only 1 crib and an adult’s bed in there.  And Mona Lisa was lying in the crib (the one I took a photo of last week sitting in the dress).  🙁  We asked the ladies if she was sick again (she has full blown AIDS).  The one lady said yes, very sick.  Another lady said she’s getting better.  And that was all the information we could get out of them.
This is what we think… she’s taken a turn for the worse, and one of the ladies is sleeping in the room with her.  Hope she’ll be OK.  I hope we’re wrong.
It was just sooo sad seeing her there.  I can’t explain how tiny she is and she’s almost 2 years old.  The crib she’s sleeping in is one of those wicker cribs for newborns, and she fits into it perfectly. I stroked her hand (which is smaller than Connor’s by far), and she gave me such a beautiful smile. 

I hope my visit tomorrow afternoon will be a happier one.