Yip, I’m thinking it’s nearly that time.
I always said that I would broach the birds and bees subject with the kids when they asked the questions, and I would be truthful. It’s best to hear the proper story than a convoluted mess that kids can spin (and I would then have to unravel).
But after being asked the question today, by a colleague who has kids the same ages… I’ve decided that I’m not prepared for this at all.
And I think I need to be.
So now the question is… how have you told your kids? And have you told them? And when did you tell your kids (age)? What prompted it?
I looked on Kalahari this afternoon, and there are plenty books that explain it to kids, and for parents, but which ones are good? Anyone have any idea?
This evening on the way home I had to chuckle. I had this blog post in my head the whole afternoon, and then Connor pipes up from the back seat “Mommy, where do babies come from?”!! LOL! Talk about timing?! Thankfully at his age, 3, the answer that babies come out of mommies tummies suffices… but Bradley’s going to need more information… question is… how much and what is age appropriate?
There is a great book called Where Do I Come From by Peter Mayle. My parents gave it to me when I was about Bradleys age.
Very simple language, great illustrations.
They gave it to me to read and told me that I could ask them anything I didnt understand.
I loved that book.
There are other books by him to for puberty etc…
Amazon link – http://mzan.si/d28v
Kalahari link – http://mzan.si/GHrQ
Hi Jeanette
Taine is that one in the class! He doesn’t know about the actual act, the intimacy bit, I have told him that you need a mom and dad and that it is a special act for 2 grown ups and that has kept him happy. He knows the kissing comes first but hasn’t joined the dots. I explained the egg and seed and then they wanted to know where it comes from…the mom and the dad…He does see a fair amount here. When you get the how does it get out question, then you hang onto your socks! I had a ceasar so that was easy except when they started wondering about the animals? then i just gave it to them and they both yucked and shut up. I have been told that they only really take in as much as they can handle. I hope this helps? Take care Cheryl
Keep it simple and do not overload them with unnecessary information at this stage:)
I am also looking for a book of sorts – may check out Ginas suggestion!
Cameron doesnt really ask but when D asked him does he know what sex is he said YES but then quickly ran away – so I doubt he actually does!
My parents never told me anything, I found out by watching a movie at school when I was 12 or 13 years old, lol I sat there in shock. I used to watch 18 age restricted films, so I always thought sex was 2 adults rolling around on the bed naked together. Anyways, it’s good to tell your kids, but don’t base the time to tell them on someone else’s kids, you decide when they are ready to hear it. I think a book is a good idea.
I still have a book (was yours or Elaine’s?) – Bradley may have seen it yesterday on the shelf next to the books he was reading – ‘How did I begin’ and maybe he prompted Connor to say something!!
Good explanation Cheryl – and you’re right – they only understand what they can handle. Your boys have the advantage of watching the animals and they must surely ask what they’re doing!
Ok, so just yesterday the princess asks where does babies come from. I do the standard answer I have been using for her for the last few years, and guess what? Not happy with that any more. But how does the seed get into the mommy’s tummy, she asks? So yes, I am also looking for books. Hear about a good Afrikaans one: Kom ons praat oor waar babs vandaan kom, by Robie Harris at Bookclub. Maybe it is in English too? Apparently at CNA
oooo I love this subject. 🙂 My girl asked me when she was three, how babies get out of the mommy’s tummy. I told her that usually the baby comes out of the mommy’s vagina, and that the vagina is made to stretch like a rubberband when it is time for the baby to come out. I also told her that sometimes the doctor has to take babies out of the mommy’s tummy with surgery if the baby gets stuck, or needs to come out quicker for some reason. She just looked at me and said, “That’s cool, mom! and went on her way. It was easy for me, as we have always been open about talking about bodies, so it didn’t seem strange.
She didn’t ask about how babies get in the the mommy until this past summer (age 5). I told her this: Daddys have a thing called sperm, that look like tadpoles, in their bodies, and mommy’s have eggs in their bodies that are soft like fish eggs. The mommy and the daddy get together and have a special kind of cuddle, then the sperm goes from the daddy’s body into the mommy’s body, and looks for the egg. When it finds it, it breaks into the egg, and a baby starts to grow.
She didn’t ask anything looking for more detail, so I didn’t go into the actual “sex” part yet, but if she asks….I plan to be simple and straight forward. The daddy’s penis goes into the mommy’s vagina and the sperm goes out into the mommy’s body.
Honestly, I hope she asks sooner than later, because I really feel that it is easier to tell a younger child this than an older one. Young kids won’t get embarrassed by it. They don’t have experiences that make them think that the body is gross or that the sex organs are embarrassing to talk about.
Hope that helps!
Quintus (10) knows the whole thing BUT I told him over a year or two. As he asked the questions.
I think it started with him seeing those ‘naked’ pictures of men and women in the doctor’s rooms. He wanted to know why women and men are different. Just explained about the differences. Gave him the correct words.
Later he wanted to know if a boy can make a girl pregnant (he heard this at school) I said yes and he wanted to know how. I explained. He got it since we had already spoken about the difference between a man and woman. It made sense to him.
So now he knows not to have random sex with any woman, how you can get aids. That it’s meant for a serious relationship only once you can afford to support a baby and preferably when you are married.
Corey’s explanation is awesome!! “Special kind of cuddle” that’s rad.
Can’t wait to have kids again so I can experience this kind of awkward. Goodluck Jenty! Let us know how it goes 🙂
I never discussed it formally with my knucklehead, I just answered his questions if he asked- age appropriately- and if there was an opportunity or a chat we’d expand.
His favourite time to talk was always in the car, probably because we can’t sit and look at each other while I’m driving so neither of us needed to feel too embarrassed about the topic. We covered everything from wet dreams to conception, and almost all of it by chatting in the car!
😀