So, you all know by now that I’m close to my 40th birthday… yeah I know… by the time it actually gets here you’ll be sick of me saying it 😉

After my annual trip to the gynae yesterday and a discussion this morning about my bucket list project and big birthdays on Twitter with @samanthaperry @MamaZombieZA @NocturnalWenchy@kambabe and @ShazPhoto I started thinking about how I’m approaching this birthday.

40 doesn’t frighten me.  At all.

In fact, 30 didn’t either.  At the time the only thing I hadn’t achieved that I’d wanted to by then, was having my first child.  I was more concerned about the trip we took to London at the time 🙂 LOL!

It’s not that I’m not aware of my age.  I know I’m not getting younger.  The only thing that frightens me is not having money to retire.  And the fact that there are very very few aging female photographer who are actually making money… LOL! One of the reasons I can’t stop working full-time.

It’s all about control and independence to me… always has been.  LOL!

I think milestone birthdays make you think about what you’ve actually achieved since the last one.  Or at least, they make me think about it.  And I also think that that’s where some of the angst comes from.  But if you sit and actually think about it, and not just about negatives which are always easier to think about… you do realise how much you’ve done.  I’m not going to actually blog about that today though, because I still have almost 2 months to achieve more 😉

40 is not the same as other birthdays though, because the milestone is not only in your head.  The medical fraternity has decided that when you turn 40 you need tests… and that became more real to me when I visited the gynae yesterday.

Now I have to book for mammograms.  Really not looking forward to that, but I’d rather know than not know.  She also scared me a little with thoughts of turning 46!! My oath! 40 I can handle, but 46 is a BIG number.  LOL! That came up because we were discussing contraceptives and what to do before I won’t need them again.  That’s quite a thought that!!

And then, I also know that I need to have my eyes tested from this year.  There’s glaucoma in the family, and I need tests from now on to make sure I don’t get it.

I’m determined that my 40’s will be amazing and incredible… I’m going to ensure that they are.

But actually, after all that… my birthday will just be that… another birthday and in fact… just another day.  This milestone business is really all in our heads and not really real.

What do milestone birthdays mean to you?  Are you looking forward to, or dreading your next one?