MIL has been staying with us since January, and it’s been a really hard and difficult time for everyone.
Then last week she fell. And it got worse, because now there was no doubt in anyone’s mind that she needed full time nursing care.
On Friday, we finally found a frail care home that was close by, almost affordable, and I knew someone who could give me a good review of the place. It was a chaotic weekend filled with completing forms and talking to people about this move.
On Tuesday this week, I took her to the GP for a checkup on her back and for him to complete the medical questionnaire. The plan was to take her for an assessment with the matron at the home afterwards too. My mom came with me for support, and I’m so glad she was there.
Well, that was the start of one of the most horrific days ever!
The doctor started off refusing to sign the medical form because he felt it was unfair of us to plonk her into a home just because her back was sore. So say I lost it right then, would be an understatement.
I fell apart. Through my tears I told him what we’d been through in the last 6 months, and that she needed full-time nursing care. I can’t do it anymore, and I’m convinced Beauty (my helper) is close to walking out on us.
Then after the Xrays, when we got back into the room, he was like a different person, and clearly had time to think about what he’d said to me, because he was very willing to complete the form.
I suppose, in hindsight, he needed to do it. He needed to have her best interests at heart. But OMW it was the last straw for me.
Then we went to the old age home, and MIL lost it once she realised where we were. But once she got inside, and started talking to them, she calmed down and chatted away, and was quite willing to stay there.
To cut a very long story short, and not wanting to actually talk about the last day and night at all… they were even more horrific and stressful, I can thankfully say that she is now at the home and being cared for properly.
And we have our house and our own space back. And we can all start healing.
Through all this, my parents have been amazing! Having gone through this with their parents, they get what we’re going through, and have been an amazing support to all of us.
The boys went to my parents’ house early this morning, so that they weren’t around for her leaving, it just wasn’t going to be the greatest thing for them to experience… and this popped up in my Facebook feed 😉
Needless to say, I’m shattered and we all need a holiday. Bring on Knysna!