I was showing Connor snaps from the previous evening earlier today (meaning I’d posted them on Snapchat). One of the videos I posted was with him creating a helmet for his viking outfit for school. In it, I said that he was making a helmet because he’d lost the helmet that we were initially going to use for the outfit.
I’d been so mad at him! He drives me absolutely batty. He loses everything. I can’t tell you how many ties, school caps, blazers, shoes etc I’ve had to replace. Just this week I had to buy him a new tie and school cap before school one morning. And then he went and “lost” the old dress-up helmet between my mom’s house and our house.
So, we found a website that explained how to make viking helmets from cereal boxes, and that became the new plan. And we had fun making it. We even got Bradley involved in the crafty exercise.
What I didn’t need to do was record that video. My word I hurt his feelings so very much… and in the process my heart got squeezed.
And in the end, after all that missioning and heartache and shouting and screaming… we actually found the original helmet in his room… tucked away in a tiny drawer for some very bizarre reason.
This morning, when he got ready for school… he decided that he didn’t want to wear either of the helmets after all…
I wonder if it was because of me.
In hindsight, I only realised how badly I spoke to him when I watched the video again. It was good that I video’d it… it made me realise how wrong I was.
I told him this evening that I thought I’d acted really badly, and asked whether he thought I’d been nasty. He nodded. Wow that hurt. And yes, before you ask, I did apologise.
Poor kid. I feel so awful.
I need to try harder at being a mom.
Thankfully snaps only last 24 hours and I didn’t save it.
Now wondering whether I should post this…
We all have those moments… Trust me. You are a great mom! We can’t be perfect all the time – and at least you spoke to him about it and realized you made a mistake.. Owning a mistake is greater than faking perfection.
Ah Jeanette – I think you did not go overboard. Honestly they do need to learn about being responsible. C also looses so much – he drives me nuts. Remember my post about losing things…. I strongly believe if we do not address this as harsh as possible we are not doing our duty as moms
Jents – don’t be too hard on yourself! These kids test us to a degree I never thought possible. And owning our response is probably a more valuable lesson to them in the long run than teaching them to look after their damn stuff! I’ve had to apologize to them for losing my shit with them more than a few times. I just hope it means they realize that no one is right all the time and saying sorry when you’re wrong is the right thing to do!
Reminds me of when I lost it about something and then I calmed down and said to my Connor, “I’m so sad because I screamed and shouted like that” and he said, “well, Mummy, it’s your own fault you’re sad. Just stop shouting” (mortified!)
Lol he’s too clever!
We All have our days….
If Nicola loses her things it gets replaced out of her pocket money. It’s cut down dramatically in the things that go missing around here.
I’ve been doing that too.
You are only human Jents. Kids can drive us and push us over the edge but I do believe what is important is owning up to the fact that we also make mistakes and showing them how to apologise also grows their EQ
xxx